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S is for Sssssssssssssssssspam

Today's letter is S.
For more S posts,
please click here.

Congratulations are in order.  Maybe. I am a new multi-millionaire.

Rather, I would be a multi-millionaire if I respond to these e-mails.
  • Morgan David & Associates from Bristol England stated I am the beneficiary of over 8 million pounds. The firm broke the delicate news about an unknown patron with  "Dear Sir/Madam."

  • Chan from China, a former investment banker, wrote that his former employers have asked him to contact me and let me know that if I do not accept $15.7 million dollars from an American account, they will keep the money forever.  All I need to do is give them my phone number and date of birth.

  • Mr. Oyi John, of the Federal High Court of Nigeria, wrote that I must prove I am not dead. Otherwise, someone named Mr. Jones McBolt will transfer $2.5 million from my account into his. There is a hitch. How shall I prove that I am the one and only living Charbel Aad?

  • Mrs. Anthonia Emma has been instructed to pay me $1.5 million. It will be paid in amounts of $5,000, three times a day until the end of the year. And guess what? This same message was sent to me by the Western Union Office.

  • A British citizen named Mr. George Clesse, working as a financial manager for the Chevron British Oil Company, wants to strike a secret deal with me. Shh! He says he is willing to give me half of $13.1 million from a client in Mexico, with whom he has lost touch and who he thinks was murdered by drug lords. All I have to do is contact a certain London bank and so forth and so on.

  • Olarn Chaipravat sent me a top secret message. So secret and so long, I have no idea how much I will be receiving. I just must make sure I don't tell anyone. He did say "Good luck."

  • London barrister Ken Cole sent me an email because my surname is similar to his deceased client and no closest of kin has stepped up to claim $32 million. I must send him my contact information tout de suite so he and I can get our money ASAP.

  •  Yahoo/msn sent me a brief congratulatory note saying that I have won a computer balloting sweepstakes. Just email it back and I will soon receive an undisclosed sum. Whoopee!

  • Some unknown person wrote that I have won 815,950 euros in a Spanish sweepstake and all information could be found on the attached Word file. I just can't decide if I want to chance getting my computer possibly infected. Do I really want to be stuck with euros?

  • Someone named MARIA CRISTINA GAMBOA just wrote to get in touch with her pronto. A very legitimate transaction awaits me.

  • Madam Janina Tom is dying and she wants her $$ to go to someone who would be willing to meet her conditions. If I accept, I would give 50% to charity and use the other 50 percent to invest as I see fit and to "support and establish" her house girl when she comes to meet me.  Madam, huh?

  • Mr. James Schoenberg, secretary (U.N.) wrote that he has $2.3 million to give me for overdue payments. FedEx will deliver my $$ once I give him the essential contact information.

  • The Yahoo International Lottery in Thailand sent me a notice that I am one of 25 people who have won $1 million. If it's from Yahoo, it must be legitimate.
So, there you go. I could be a multi-millionaire.

Unfortunately, and not so regrettably, I chose to respond to these e-mails by forwarding them to spam@uce.gov.

Just think.
I could've bought myself

a bunch of these boots—one for

each day of the year.

Comments

  1. My goodness, you could be a billionaire in a blink of an eye, if you would just give up your phone number and your birthday!

    And to think, all of these winning notifications are from around the world!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Those spammers really have your number, don't they?! The sad thing is, there are many people naive enough to fall for that mess!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I really hate getting such e-mails.. they are really time wasters.. which get junked out straight away.

    Do they really thing we are so easy to be conned?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't like getting these message either.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, I get these too! I am considering quitting my job. With all these millions, do I really need to work?

    ReplyDelete
  6. The most fascinating one was the transfer of $2.5 million from your account into his. Have you really got $2.5M hanging around in your account? If so, I need some work done on my car.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I didn't even know there was a place to forward spam. Sounds like a good idea! Maybe they can actually catch some of these annoying spammers.

    Fun post. I'm always amazed that they think anyone would fall for these scams. Then, I learn about someone that DID fall for them and am even more amazed.

    =)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Does a little age make us wise and not fall for con tricks??? My banker thought I was falling for a con trick because I sold some foreign stock and presented a "weird looking" check. It looked like one of those dummy checks. I'm glad someone is looking out for me. Ha Manzanita

    ReplyDelete
  9. You really get hit hard with them. I only get the chance to cash their checks about once every few months..lol...

    ReplyDelete
  10. I hate spam.. so boring.. I delete so much of it EVERY day.. sigh. AND THEN, my comments on half the blogs I go to, land in spam! Grrr.

    Maggy

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hahaha I thought this was going to be about the canned meat. I am such an idiot!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. wild boots and funny post!
    I usually erase my span 50 comments at a time... {:-Deb

    ReplyDelete
  13. LOVE this. I get a few of these, but THIS is a treasure trove. And have you ever wondered why you are such an attractor of spam? Could it be your magnetic personality?

    (Here from Alphabe-Thursday, nice to meet you.)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Next time we see a limousine drive by, we'll know that someone gave out their name and birthday. How else could they possible afford a limousine, after all?

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thank you, one and all, for reading my long post and giving me your loving feedback.

    The husband told me that I can now also bounce the spam back to the sender, after I've forwarded it to the place that takes reported spam. It's spam@uce.gov, if you're wondering. Who knows, maybe spammers will hook onto that address and send their spam directly to it. Now, that's funny!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Thanks for the tip and the email

    I used to get those Nigerian ones .

    ReplyDelete
  17. ...and you're ignoring them all? :)
    Wouldn't life be so sweet if it were true, we get inundated with Africans devising similar cons to the above - so boring now

    ReplyDelete
  18. ...and you're ignoring them all? :)
    Wouldn't life be so sweet if it were true, we get inundated with Africans devising similar cons to the above - so boring now

    ReplyDelete
  19. My spam filters must be better than I realized. It's been ages since I've seen any of these.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I think we should create a club of new millionaires, because I am in the same case as you ! I don't know what to do with all this money !!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hahaha!!! I am impressed that you had those hanging about to share with us! I wish I had thought of that! Instead, when I see those show up in my inbox (I think "Yeah, right." as I send them to my "Report spam" box.) It would have been interesting to see just how many of those goofy emails I have received!

    Lovely boots, by the way :o)

    Blessings & Aloha!
    OH, I have to admit...maybe its my hubby's Hawaiian influence and how Spam (the canned meat) is so popular in Hawaii...that when I read your title...I thought you were talking about that "Spam"! lol

    ReplyDelete
  22. Oh man!

    I feel all kinds of cheated now.

    I thought they were only writing to me.

    OK. I guess I'll just let you answer them then!

    Thanks for the wonderfully silly link to Alphabe-Thursday's letter "S" this week.

    I really enjoyed my stop here.

    A+

    ReplyDelete

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Thanks for the good cheer. :-)

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